EXAMPLE SENTENCES TO PRACTICE CONCISENESS AND THE PARAMETIC METHOD:

(Print versions of exercise: pdf | docx.)

To revise these sentences, you should follow the paramedic method and principles of revising sentences described in the "Revising Sentences Using the Paramedic Method" Writing Guide.

1. The decision was made by my boss yesterday.

2. Their motives were applauded by us, but their wisdom was doubted.

3. The meeting was coordinated by Doug in Paul's absence.

4. Even when the sun is hidden and the sky is speckled with stars, the heat lingers, hanging motionless in the air.

5. There were ten students in Mrs. Robinson's class.

6. It is the governor who signs or vetoes bills.

7. Controlling the quality and level of television shows that children watch is a continuing challenge to parents that they must meet on a daily basis.

8. Your figures were checked by the research department.

9. My recommendation is for a larger budget.

10. It is essential that we act immediately.

11. Please take into consideration my offer.

12. Our disposal procedure is in conformity with federal standards.

13. We are currently in the situation of completing our investigation of all aspects of the accident.

14. There are many women who never marry.

15. The fact of the matter is that machines merely amplify worker's abilities and exist only as they are able to do the bidding of workers effectively.

16. There are people that have the impression that Spanish is our first language, and English is a second.

17. There was a bonfire going, and some music playing in the background, but not very many people were dancing.

18. The point I wish to make is that the employees working at this company are in need of a much better manager of their money.

19. It is our hope that you will find these changes mutually beneficial for yourself and your students.

20. The impact of the shortage of paper in the publishing industry is that it is not a short term problem but will be with us for some time to come and can seriously affect the number of books produced by the industry.

Check Answers Sentences 1-10 | Sentences 11-20

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Practice Exercise Revising a Paragraph Following the Paramedic Method--Exercise #2

--mark up and revise it yourself first, and then check your version against this one
(Note: Sentence may be revised many different ways, so no one right answer exists.)

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